why it pays to be kind humble and smart 

nowadays ive been on the hunt for genuine happiness. facebook has been such a joy giver all the pages or blogs per se i follow post some ridiculous on point (pardon the jargon) shit that totally meshes well or like, um relates well in my life, speaking of, I keep ordering mcdonalds delivery food, note the double iced coffee for my caffeine boost and extra virgin vanilla jk lawl ive been dealing heavy stuff lately. I mean my blog means the world to me as it is my baby. It really makes me happy someone, you probably don’t know, but a simple like can make my day bloom.

It has been 35 days since I resigned. I have gone through emotional whirlwinds I cannot myself comprehend. Done shit as an agent I couldn’t fuckin compromise as it goes against my logic and identity… Things such as

1 begging clients in chinese, translating chinese, helping my teammates …former,speak in chinese hilariously

2 chasing richies

3 giving my card and having small talk la la

4 enjoying the fuck out of my job

… i feel like my life died a bit when i left sales

Good thing, Ms J …lets just call her that, came to my rescue last September 4 like omg I was getting bully vibes from my teammates but nonetheless, Karma is there to teach us humility and patience,

So I met this lady who gave me her card.

I got deep, deep salute to her as she is the Girl Boss I always always will follow and admire …hello Dior, my first official girl boss.

Also Ms Mary Chinjen, shout out to you,

I hope you both will make my journey worthwhile and teach me lessons worth more than a golden minefield.

To my Taiwan experience, goodbye. Also, Alveo. Good bye.

Love you all.

xx Sher 2018

pls dont be scared

keep the faith

the rest will follow




so i totally like today

whilst it still

is 11:54,i miss LA and the good vibes around there .

yeah nobody cares

im unemployed

i often try

but when do i stop

my patience eventually runs


neither does my career shift

it has been hard

i pretend it is all happy

post nice shit on fb

live my legacy as an eagle

but wounds hurt

and my heart dies day by day

emo much but ey

so much people hurt me

should i still


or run away

…cheers from my enemies



recently i made my first trip to divisoria alone at manila,

for foreigners, divisoria is a thrift flea market that sells all kind of crazy affordably ridiculous things

that is

if you know how to haggle

since last 2013

i came there

went back last Nov 12

prices have indeed changed


like pricey AF

but am glad super


i was able to go by myself

despite fearing getting lost

many kind souls were there to guide my way

and even make chit chat to me

like there really are sellers dedicated

to their job

and some really kind





go back

next year

see you, sales

thank u, next xx sher

speechless ft go sing a song

shoot for the moon, so that when you fall you will land amongst the stars


i can’t thank the lord enough how much it took me to resign and bring back the faith i got


you may,call it

i have been working my ass off double shift since january

i was completely terrified

getting kicked out of real estate

getting tormented and laughed at by wicked bosses


yun lang ang masasabi

mga pangarap,anu pinapaglaban mo

kalimutan na

ang mga nananakit


may bagong araw,oras,panahon sa isang araw

okay lang di niyo ko tawagan, pamilya ko

tuloy lang ako sa mundo.

wala man love life


okay na okay gud

tapos natutuwa ako

naka divi magisa guy


music is my everything

my soulmate, best friend, comforter

my reliever

so am not too religious

but universe

thanks a mil

sum daze


i truly regret ,2018 has been such a wasted year

i left my job at alveo


in the dumpster

worked for sh*t ass bosses

who cannot get THE work done

and even handle you with this nasty, self entitlement you got served dish.

so dont work for them


im very worried


not my thing.

i cried before


see the huge or like life time


i made !

wtf holy sh*t, like

i woke up

and my jobs gone.

i still have two months …

two months for what !

contract ends december 20

who cares ?

evil is evil

and choose your battle

love and light




i never quite like them romantic stories where people say sappy shit and make googly eyes with one another.

i lost five …and still counting, motherfucking years in,my life

all started 2014.

this will be my first christmas,alone

no family yeps yeps

no more shit tours…


gonna change.

thanks you


im f*cking


i love y’all

frou frou


over the course of my life i have gained enough courage to let go of the past but sometimes dreams come in the form of water to shake us out of our reality, the doors we dared opened and the consequences we face everyday, the decisions we make and fight .

i deeply cannot forgive my mom and all her antics, drama and mess

but i know as an adult i am responsible for what i say and do, and saying less means being blessed more by grace everyday and my faith stands stronger and moves mountains,

as i write this, i wish my life were just a paper towns movie.


everything is on paper

and you just watch the roles play.

and you could disappear and no one will notice

… note the jenna hamilton reference

my life feels like it went dead for five years

i just woke up and opened my eyes to a new light… that of being an adult but missing the lingering feeling of being a teenaged rebel who always possessed spunk, attitude and rock and roll vibes

to the talented college admu me who sang avril songs precomposed by me, edited and shit

and people just congratulated you

for the insane lyrics and humour of it all

to sleeping in class and lousy prefactorial teachers like theologians cray waking the hell outta you and asking you silly questions like phone sex and shit

like whut in the world

and you blabber some nonsense sense-ical answer in return


why is life like a moving train

you see it in pictures,

you pretend its a movie

but movies end

in,tightropes and figures

speeches and remarks

winners and trophys

what about- the battle of troy, significance and splendor

the glory of death

of fight club

-people who actually cared

clean freak.


hello loves. it felt good to be 26. turning 27 in april next year but the hype continues on proving myself to the world . its quite disappointing im no performer in the realm of arts, a designer by profession, a business owner or something that i dream of.. all i did was graduate admu by 21 and work

you know that feeling when you get older you get some bee jees or like hair raising feel that you are actually alive

and nobody can bring you down

because you only get one life

so might as well be the best version of your self



learn from your mistakes,

truly appreciate people

most esp God

the Maker of all good things

Someone you can come to

Someone whom gave you enough battles to prove to the world you are not a weakling

So if you get depressed some days

Or if you are living alone like me

Get out and talk to people

I may be out of sales

But my heart for humanity

is not ever cold

thank you everyone

xx sher




i hope u become successful

woke up in the morning today

i have been having insomnia for the past two weeks

im glad i woke up at 7 today when i slept at three

thats the grandest

i also unfollowed my first 💋


im glad i was friends with T and he didn’t block me when I said goodbye to him

Im quite sad nobody likes my blog posts anymore

But its alright.

I originally planned to go shopping today

Ukay in Philippines or Thriftshop

But Im too lazy

Way too tired cleaning everyday


Wish I have kids already


Anyhow boo hoo

Happy halloween loves

Thanks for 103 friends in FB, 40 followers in IG and 112 here at WordPress

xx Hugs

power mac spotlight


distance &faith

im quite happy beyond odds

ive liked my own post four times

not expecting anyone to like this anymore

but will keep fighting

my back


i cannot believe

i was able

to make it


circuit makati



i got invited for a free event


all of a sudden

i went there

was thirty min late

and the lady outside the booth promoting stuff ushered me like cray

i mean

there were no ushers

i was so blessed nakarating ako


first time ko manuod

sobrang ganda

like when i entered it felt like a bar slash boxing ring feel

pitched black,

then i just listend to ate telling me which direction to go

that was the highlight i guess

people guiding you when you feel lost as fuck


dying inside



letting go

putting walls down

efforts that remain unanswered

sobrang deep

may pa ballet dance pa


and talk about death

such a meaning full pre halloween for me

i wished my mom wer there to watch with me


so many tears flood this 2018

keep going, strong woman




hey all its raining today in mnl philippines and i recently got out my condo to buy food and shakes, paid 20 to the tric driver whom told me he always noticed me walking by the streets, commenting i walk quite too far from where i was going and im like shutting up since he is a stranger old man and im minding my own business

kidding aside i literally save money by walking so even though plenty times jeepneys motorbikes esp cars beep honk and yap at me, like “DO YOU WANNA DIE”

I still cross the streets and walk.

Tbh abroad you can easily navigate the streets due to pedestrians and walkways,

how i wish in the future there will be a plan to build more walkways in the streets so people wont jaywalk anymore



i miss working

later on i might try to go out again and go to circuit and pretend i have a social life

i was invited to a free entrance to power mac spotlight and it might be my first time to watch there if ever i do come


wish me luck

my mom wants me home since i know marami yan papautos sakin

im like no mom im staying here



thanks y’all

been nice and warm

stay alive



most days i listen to music and sleep during the day like a vampire awake at night and full of the moon and thoughts that both disturb and intrigue me …1000 to 5000 thoughts they say

all i have right now is panic at the disco and this is gospel, my music and own beat. my disposition and my  choice continues to use logic and calmness to my solution as the world spins around and what goes around comes back around

my mom has been such a stella in the abs cbn drama as she always goes so dramatic and full of blame

i changed since i dont react anymore to her hurled comments

basically keep quiet or minimal but strong reply to her messages

i dont wanna go home until 2019 dawns on me

i always appreciate people supporting me

ive been fighting a war since 2013 october when i fell literally five times hundred

i am coping

i know one day my day will come

here is to all people who dream

a life of significance




you become better



just around the corner

so like yestuhday i took my insurance exam like a pro __ um

i really didn’t study much so i quite predicted to say sorry i failed the test since it has 50 items and the mock exams were quite difficult to understand……


a miracle happened, all my sleepless nights worrying turned out real mighty fine as i took the exam around 15 min since computerized and time limit and all and you gotta have a username

mine was st.chan@acevariable


i had a great time last oct 24 -25 since

i went to the gym then was able to buy at kevins toy store 100 php real cool collectible toys probably from clash of clans

they also sell ninja turtle

pero mejo hype

kaya i went with the unique quirky cool ones

check my ig they’re there.


the next morning as always unable to have a sleep cycle i basically ordered yet another mcdonalds delivery but this time it was the best as it arrived no sooner than ten minutes and the two piece chix was so delish like uhhhm

then i grab then arrived at un ave…

didn’t know

what to expect

i hate exams since sales made me dumber people watching…

but ey

i passed oh waw

didn’t breathe

for like fifteen minutes

trauma na ko sa exam

kasi like the last exam sa ortigas training  (they literally have a lot of training) … my seatmate checked my answer wrong when it was right.

tapos ako pag mag check nung sakanya kahit mali spelling check nalang like i just gauged it on his deviance more than the regular academic precision

but he naman on the other hand corrected my super duper minor mistakes like maybe my handwriting was not legible for his understanding.

the worse

was making my right answer wrong to the point i had to ask a random girl seatmate on the left if tama ba yung sagot


i woulda gotten three or like two dumb mistakes lang but i got like around 4.5 or 5 mistakes thanks to him

actually 2 mistakes lang

pero the trainor gio praised me naman

tapos ako lang nakapasok from our so called team sa training room

since my then boss threatened me of salary deduction if i didn’t come


may sakit pa ko non

grabe noh


enough about it

im quite ecstatic napasa ko yung license exam

i was ready to fail pero waw

and btw glorietta 3 and 4 are the best


never ko na appreciate since always manning ako since 2017 sa ayala malls greenbelt and glorietta

di ko alam ano na mangyari sakin

sira yung circadian rhythm ko huhuhuhu

ilang weeks na kong zombie

100 years na

since 2009

nag move out ako dorm na sa college di nakakatulog


sleep is life pa naman

sana naman maging maayos na

tipidera pa kasi sobrang takot ako walang allowance

tapos may client na nag offer nanaman nang job

tama na pls

sobrang dami na kong nakilala this year tbh na gusto ako ihire


dream ko lang naman magkastore na street vibes hay hay buhay

walang pondo

my fashion designer dreams died

but i still doodle.

dunno about ma though

mediyo mahal

hirap na magaral pag nagtatrabaho ka na

unless kaya mo ibalance

ok thanks bye

sorry for the rant

im so tired the whole motherfucking year

met tons of people


i hope i get my voice heard

this time

up to the next years


Standard times , call for big things


life is perfect

especially to those who know how to wait and run at the same time.

today was amazing! i just revamped my blog again for some grunge vibes since im really emo in persona

and its halloween yay folks!

today i fit a beige whitish chunky heels that cost 450 php and like the lady was telling in the air how it looked pretty on me but like i cant really wear it so it just looked purdy

i realize since 2017 or 2016 when i knew about my savings leftover in the bank, basically debut money as charity from my always ever money loving rents…

i kept buying stuff i dont need.

talagang hoarder ako ng abubut at mga kyuti na bagay

tapos di naman nagagamit


i am still learning

esp how broke i am slash broken inside

thanks to the people who like my content

hearing me out yo


its been a wild ride

i miss you, sales

sana ok lang ako maging magisa sa pasko

ello grinchella

hahah im changing na sobra


good luck to me bukas


oks lang walang may pake alam nang ig ko

problema ko

istorya ko

mga reasons ko kung bakit nagresign ako

ok lang

sapat na tong blog

kalimutan mo na yan


oh so cool


hey all

ive revamped my blog

someone unfollowed


but its okay

i became my 111st follower.

some days are so boring

but i always try to be cooler than cool.

to live in the moment

style your illusions

live practically

treasure the little things

find stuff make you happy

here is gone.

hey y’all !! whadup 😊

currently unemployed and my back hurts from losing so much sleep and all the stress that comes with unemployment.

but hey i am coping so far, my room is messy but clean.

i do feel i might fail the exam on friday

but am glad timezone is opening at ayala circuit so yey

not giving a f*ck much to people who dont give a f*ck

wishing i can shop by dover street in nyc

i hope i can always count my blessing no matter how much pain sorrow weight stress anxiety problems i do carry

i got mah back

xx sherr



trust me when i say

im trying so hard to fight

a war i cannot win

my family and their lack

of support

or rather

obvious lack thereof

my nonexistent friends

me quitting my job

with resonance

wishing for peace

of mind heart soul

somebody told me

i cannot make a sale

many many many many

time it echoed in me


i just stay grounded

be focused

murphys law

chase your dreams

thanks lloyd cervantes

you told me

for each developer i join

i will fail



cool cat


the last time

i was happy was

when i went shopping and found this honda brand cap


💯 wings embroidery

complete with nascar patches and race car vibes

worth 180 php

i felt like i can overthrow the world with that one cap

among my plenty more cap collection

reminising the year

i have been thru most malls

“thru these tears” by lany is such the song of the year

and “girls like you”

the catchiest.

my dream is that i become successful in my new job

and return with ease back to ortigas


i wish to go back to hawaii and guam


i hope to open my own business gleaning towards arts fashion bars and the like

street and so forth

i miss being 20

the opportunities i had

and the many challenges i have overcomed

truly life is great

xx sherr



dear sherr

thank you for everything.

i rarely say thanks to myself,

always conscious of what other people might think of me,

always pretending im better off alone,

always trying hard to defend myself from people or nasty b*tches trying hard to fall over by bringing me down

but you know what

probably giving a sh*t is what most gets a person to danger.

the best way to heal is to ignore negativity and accept murphy’s law

the best way to solve problems is to do something that will change your future each day.

time goes thru

everyone should start to re-evaluate themselves

know their inner strength

build castles and fortress


by knowing what is truly


what do you live for

become happiness

own your truths

leave stress and the rest

stay put

speak your voice

handle situations calmly

grace effort gratitude

beyond limits

aim taker

game changer




yung feeling na

tataba ka sa lifestyle mo


currently unemployed

after a year of working

mga lagpas six months din

mediyo wasak


kulang sa tulog kain

kaya tumataba

dati payat talaga ko po

138 lbs like 65 kg

normal for five feet almost six heights

anyways um

it truly is dawn

i cennet sleep i am super excited for work

finally blocked na nanay ko for life

sana mabilanggo siya


tatay ko naman talaga never naging tatay eh

kuripot pareho


sana kahit mabigo ako di ako mag papaapekto

tuloy lang

btw went to santa mesa

bought someshit again

truly feels the xmas vibes

never been to a halloween party

since birth



im not scared anymore of horror movies

or zombies

wag lang ako tulakin ulit sa outbreak manila

grabe kaampon yun

nabangga nang tods

nachip ngipin ko huehue

kaya tumaba nang bongga

like 60kg motherfucka

i lost ten pounds na or twenty

parang twenty

kaso i need to lose 65 pounds to go back to 65 kg lala noh

grabe yung mga nag paiyak sakin

alam mo talaga ang mundo

alam natin sino yung totoong mabait

alam nang diyos

kahit wala akong magulang

aayusin niya lahat

thank you lord

sana kagaya ni chinkee tan marunong na ko mag tipid wehe

wag na po ako tawaging ate

ugh hahahaha

ha ha ho ho

let em haters go

gotta be kind

to be rise to the top


what matters most in your life?

to me its sleep self care which im not good at





friends and lovers




forever mine

xx xx



3k nalang natira sa pera ko lololol

ayoko magwithdraw sa banko


grabe maggastos si ateng

kanina nakabili ako nang jansport bag na 250 can ya believe it?! sa makati lang


grabe mga hole in the walls

marami ka talaga mahahanap

i overspent tho sa mga accessories mehe

kaso oks lang

grabe nakabili ako na black pants leggings yas for 250

kaso the rest of it um

haha napunta sa mga body sprays and shzz



oks lang地

di naman maubusan nang gas trolol


was awesum


intelligence is sexy


so what ive worked 1 year six mos in sales

talked to alotta people

merged time around idiots

spent time chatting away with prudy wannabes

people whom never understood the pain i had inside

the pain i always carried

but nevermind

sales, i will miss you

i cannot believe the times i saturated alone

all the other agents from other developers ive basically encountered

that moments ive suicided inside a public smoking lounge and gave out flyers while chinese people smoked out

that time nobody knew me or

i felt like a dead zombie

waiting to be saved

by no one

im proud of my 1 year 6 months

i have resigned

october 13 2018 sure na sure na

sana lord kaw na bahala

ok naman ako

masakit lang yung marami kang sakit sa loob

tapos mediyo grabe ka mag mahal

kaya parati nasasaktan

pero wala naman

nagmamahal sayo

kaya ayaw na drama

sikap at tiyaga



don’t give any fox

meganon na patapos na yung taon tapos mapapa…wtf ka sa mga desisyon na ginawa mo. kunwari nalang, paglipat mo sa ibang developer. isa pa doon, yung nalipat ka nga without applying pero sa masamang division ka naman tapos yung A game boss na sobrang kupal at mayabang at may kotse grabe kadeadma sayo mas maganda pa porma mo sakanya noong sales rally, pero nung triny mo lumipat nang grupo grabe ka sermon inabot mo sakanya parang nasalanta nang ompong tas binaha at linipad nang hangin ang tingin doon kasi grabe mag insulto tapos nangingi nabang sa weakness mo na sensitive ka

sinabihan ka pang prinsesa ka ba

oc ka ba



sabi pa may problema daw ako

kahit saang developer daw ako mapunta

wala raw magbabago


wala akong na meet sa buhay ko na ang lakas nang loob manlait sakin in person , wish ko sana marecord yun ulet para marinig at makita nang iba for proof

pero for some personal safety state ko nalang nang mas maayos na reason, basic reason bakit ako muna aalis

kasi alam mo

tao ako

di ako checke pang loi

kaya kung may galit ka sa intsik

wag mo ko idamay don

grabe kung maka snob

tapos kakausapin ka lang pasimple na dapat may checke na sa verdant this october

wala na tatalab sa ugali

di mo narin mababalik o mababawi mga sinalita mo

as for this person who chatted me and i added back

i just don’t like what you do to me

i only ride on my own

and if you can’t keep a straight face in public

not much i can say


you know what i did all i could

this year was the worst but truly worth the risk

jack ma says at your 20s keep making mistakes

you will find your people too

and never let anyone

take your power, abuse you, use you, talk shit to you

especially men

as for ladies who throw shade

and both genders who disrespect and cannot appreciate you

stop being kind to them

cry if you have to.

I cried last night in a resto eating paella as I left the most boring edm party ever

it felt like the gin I drank was PG 13 fresh from college back at eighteen sipping bar drinks


am glad jack ma said to make mistakes

i am only 26

been through a lot

sales has been a killer

i will fight for and come back

to win

ps : thanks lord sa mga taong inisip ko nang bigyan nang regalo sa pasko

konti lang sila

salamat sa mga maginoong mga tunay na lalake

di mga beki na ewan ba





so i have secretly accepted that there are many many things places people situations pain suffering etc in the world i cannot change

i cannot change where i come from

i cannot change the past

i cannot

undo forget all the reality that is happening

and the people around me

but what i can change is myself

my regrowth

my beginning

my disposition in life


my metamorphosis

Chivalry is dead.


hey loves

im in sm megamall


its been 7 hours

but hella worth it

ive been watching so much people

and their graphic tee

slang words


musicality of human beings



sobrang bano ng mga ka manning ko



why does the world rock inside my head

but i always cannot choose

the situation

im in

kailan ako magtitimpi

sobrang tagal na

walang benta

alam ko

ala tutulong saken

lahat nang ginawa ko

ako lang makakagawa

ty lord sa lakas

batak talaga imo



mga bading nakaupo sa booth



such gentleman

oh well



more work for me


-boo hoo



the light is coming

halloween is here

sherr be slayin

kudos to independent life

buhbye parentals

the hell with you all

all meaning my family

except for mac

thanks universe

always guiding me since 22

what a rough time

awhile ago

i saw a shirt that said

“retired teenager”


wishing for wellness


growing pains



All my life I have been a silent child, up to responsible sensible young adult who can drive at seventeen to a sweet rebel teenager who can stand up and fight for herself

I can handle people throwing shade at me as I know how to fight back and scream in silence but what I cannot most tolerate are the treatment my parents have shown since birth

All they do is complain they spent a million on my studies, a million on my operation, which by the way was so critical looking back I wished God whomever He is took me already

To cut it short, someday I know I can tell with bright fiery eyes and gleam how I was raised in an abusive household. Up to now that I am a working twenty something, I left all my so called friends who have decent parents and travel and have a social life.

My heart burns with hatred but nobody should judge that. Everytime I go home my mom manages to say something unkind, or just last night my dad told me, if my attitude stays the same, then nobody will come near me.

It was hurtful how he delivered it. I was simply listening at my earphones music blasting that I had nonchalantly closed the door. It was barely loud but I guess the crickets were banging that it was apparently audible.

In my heart I have humbled a sense not to cry anymore over nonsense things. But it shookt me that he really is a patriarch old man who cannot modernize his ways, who always treat others better, who cannot accept girls in the family.

I am the first born and only girl

Many times some dear people told me not to be self pity to myself, but other times you simply cannot help it

Being emo, being so hard on yourself to the point your current boss tells you be happy and not be emo

So anyway point is Im growing up

I wish to finally break the curse of the rebellious teenage angst me and live a life of my own alone. Financially capable and knows how the world works.

Thank you for reading.

If ever you do.

Happy October.



dear everyone

ive been trying real hard to stay adrift. most days i feel somewhat blank and unspoken. i talk to strangers i forget. but i never remember not to be kind. thank you for the kind souls ive met in the year. the days may be most unpleasant but the comeback overrides the setbacks

i know one day will come

that i rise

thank you for letting me speak to my one and only college crush

and also for all the beauty and art i always see and appreciate

day by day

may all the glory be to god

he is the only healer giver protector and sole refuge

he is our strength

thank you

much love.



Ey guys ! Thanks for 108

It has been a pretty rough year for me

And I am sure with all of you as well

Challenges are tough but our minds and hearts

Are enough to combat the daily obstacles we face through

Today at dawn

I painted my nails yellow

It felt so refreshing

Currently I felt that my obsession as a fangurl for Avril Lavigne has faded

She cant seem to change image and tune

The rockstar getup kinda gone

Dope ya know

Then theres this thing that keeps me up at night

How the world demands I get a boyfriend

How I am tired of putting up with questions I cannot answer

How I know I will be single for a long time

And the plenty questions I fish out the universe for

The power I used to have

The words ubiquitously jamming inside my head

When do I get my sale

How long do I have to wait

Or do I


Explode ?

Btw I plan to probably study graphic design when I can

I wanna make street wear fabulous in Manila

Something iconic and not redundant

Flashy yet cool

Whatcha think


your friendly weird neighbor , Witchita




hey ya all.


the last day of September.

woke up at 5am.

slept around 2am.

yesterday, sept. 29

i gave my flyer to a stranger from my college.

he mumbled “thanks”.

i dunno but i liked him.

but i guess we don’t have the same level of class.

like .i aint yo rich gurl

get what i mean


today went well at work.

yesterday too.

glad to be back.

i really appreciate rich people who tell me some apology that they cant buy at the moment.

i changed my tone already in my style.

barely begged.


i did. like

push people

but now

i just want a sale.

first time to be early early like hello kuya guard and cleaner

same time like the old times.

i used to log in at circuit around 5am and write amdg.

quite sad my crush is alive but barely noticed me.

or probably saw an embarassing version of myself running.



oh wells.

its okay sherry.

dont share anymore fb stories.

people dont care.

its okay.

not to be okay.

but im always okay.



love ya all betchez.





hey guys

thanks for 106

ive decided to be more optimistic

and honest or like um



am really sorry i only follow 3 blogs

i even unfollowed myself on wordpress




just got home in my makati condo

i sorta impulse buy

some black pants

the one im wearing in the photo

and a brown shirt


im getting my comm on monday!

wish me luck

im so happy i got home safely today

i spent 350 going from malabon to makati

i rode the p2p bus carrying so much stuff on my alveo paper bag

thanks so much y’all

i hope that sometimes you realize

that it hurts that someone you love doesn’t love you back

but you be happy and keep going anyway

thanks so much

much love and always

ps : maintenance is more important than progress

and true love is different from great love ?

haha really

haven’t met mine yet

kudos !



being the first born in the family of four and the eldest of three brothers, i found it quite difficult to navigate society and make sense of the political era before me. family was a question of trust and obedience. i remember in college i often go to our resident psychologist to speak my mind off. shut between worlds i only found my safe identity inside the school. dorming was a blessing and joy to someone so young and fragile, lost and meaningless. it was during third year, junior year that i made sense about academics when core subjects kicked in. i will never ever forget the times i had to edit videos for class during freshman and sophomore year, the time they had a paintball stand inside the school facility and i chickened out joining. the time i joined cads twice and got rejected. the time i got accepted to blue symphony. i passed their test or whatever. i will never forget the times i had to wait long by the waiting shed, as the clouds turn grey and my 9pm classes of crime fic was doubtful and dreary

or that time i gave my all in everything but only get a D in Math 19 or a D in Accounting10, or failing Accounting 30 or whatever that subject is next to the first Accounting subject.

i miss college so much i went there last may to get a breather.

i was badly wounded somebody blocked me just for saying good bye

i went then to our school to find refuge

best thing ever

i miss you bad ateneo

please come home for me




dearest diary

i have had enough with people who always take me for granted,

today i willingly talked with our sales director in the company, and all he did was grill me into saying how the real world is cruel and unfair and how i seem to be …sheltered wow as if he knew the path i walked onto and my character per se…

i realize how we, as a human individual, can never really find ourselves and our worth in a person,

and how we must blossom where our heart and purpose go.

i deeply tried to leave their division and my team, but sales director said how i was the only rare case that dared to do that,

as nobody tried to leave due to personal preference,

just me.

to recount,

i was really clueless how to go about, i love my job but hate how the bosses cannot close the work,

i keep comparing them to my former developer.

the fact is, i love sales as i have thrived to keep up with manning and setting appointments to so many hopefuls na closing pero

lahat paasa,

i just really wished i was placed in a good group.

it is hard to say you can thrive anyplace and bloom,

mahirap yon.

mas mahirap pa kung di mo makita sarili mo dun, and yung purpose mo

and you ask what the heck am i doing this for.

many people broke me over the past years,

people i trusted the most.

i dont even begin to understand some big douchy boss can say and hurl shit stuff like that to my face.

i know education helps in identifying people and their capabilities but this is too much,

respect is the basic human gift apart from kindness,

if one lacks that

then obviously you know which way to go darling.

never ever doubt yourself,

dont give someone the power over you.

and if you dont like the people there,

better leave with head held high.

it doesnt matter anymore.

all the praise i held,

galing yun sa taas.

lahat ng ginawa ko,

sa alveo and sa nakaraan,

the effortless work i did for ortigas.

thank you so much, sales.

maybe, i have garnered enough lessons.

nobody ought to even point it out loud.

thanks for the grand finale.

signing off xoxo


look alive


dear loves,

i havent gone home in a really long time

thanks to the likers whom inspire me

you probably dont know

but i always thank heavens

for people like you

its hard to trust strangers in the outside world


you just have to take the leap

im glad i always find rest

in this blog

amazing likers

im a flawed human

but at least i fight and get it done

you know

its been really cold

but i always tell myself its gonna get better

left all my so called friends

ive been tied up in sales since april 2017

dunno why

am i here.


all ive been doing is keeping my head above water.


that was the tune i sang last team building when i was still in my,former employer.

most high class managers there told me



daw ako





ng allowance

no parental guidance since 17

dormed na in college

echos echos aside

ive been in my condo for a year and 3 months

ive loved every bit of it

and i was the very first

to live here in this building


thank you so much.


tomorrow i might lose my job


but ya know


it will be worth it.


thank you guys so much.

love y’all 😝🏅




Hey loves!

thank you all

so much

105 follows,

wow im flanked.

I try pretending each day

to just focus on myself

my space

my loves

but you know

its really, really hard

Life is a drama

A dog eat dog world

The survival of the fittest

Very darwinian right

Haha oh my,

I got two interviews


and on Thurs

Been invisible at work

Di na ko pumapasok since

Nag hawaii so called boss ko


Haaaaaay I dont want to rant pero sobrang confusing



Napakagrateful ko though.

Thanks to Alveo.

I got too many job offers at 26

Tryna be an adult

It resurfaces

but that sad kid in me

is still there.

I cut connections off my mom

Likewise my family.

It was all too much.

I cant remember the last time I was really happy

The only people kept me going were the bosses in Ayala

It felt all too much like a dream

I wish I never left

But nobody was there to take me in for a double job or extra cash

Wala rin mangutangan

Ayoko naman mangutang.

the Glory

is all up from God.

Lahat ng ginawa ko

tingnan mo lang

kahit malugkot ako sa officemates ko

I got hired out of hard work


two days after my bday this year

alls been a blur.

I am truly confused,

I doubled my sleeping pills.

More confusing is my dad actually wanting me to pursue my “dreams”na raw like hoho srsly

I worked my damned ass of since college ended.

I dunno how to decide

whether to go with the flow ba or,

Lumaban para sa sarili ko.

Kasi di ko na alam anung gagawin.

Wala na kong pasensya

Tagal ng comm ko

Kadiri ang grupo ko

As in ako yung ginagawang crab para lahat sila umangat.

I lost also the guest list last August by a point.

Was never acknowledged really.

Am glad to the people who kept rescuing me out of that division.

So many really

All my heart


nep tune


dear lord

thank you

for everything

i owe you only me

and my amazing and thriving


lost and lonely

but will be found

thank you lord

wala na akong masabe

pasensya na

di ako masyado


nag aattend nang mass

sorry pohws

jejeje \m/

benta 🏅🏀🎆🥊 lawls kbye ♥️♦️♥️♦️♥️♦️♥️

the weight of living

hey all ive been searching wildly the answers to my goddamn problems like why did I enter sales and how come I got to encounter my past and why is love so hurting 

i realized to like never chase boys, friend or something deeper since the weight really sinks in 

and cut

ties esp people from the past who cannot ever see you for you or like treat you the way you deserve to be treated

this aint high school, elementary, or a jungle motherfuckers. 

the real world is surely tough, but not tough enough to scar us with bad sad and harrowing memories

we deserve to be a light to others and before having that kind of platitude we ought to receive bountiful light first from above

never ever look back and regret

always be grateful 

let the gate open 

and the animals rage rage more

look up

see the stars and the future 

will befall on you


dear darling

you are strong

you are great

you have reached 102


though i cant vlog

know netflix

have a credit card

listen to audible

be in parties

be someone

im quite cool


its okay

let the universe


people judge

things that aren’t true

find rest and a home

in the Lord

always be faithful

☺ love

dreamers .


dearest papa god

okay naman

buhay pa ko

nakakaiyak na 102 follows

na ako sa


kahit di ko gaano


buhay ko

buhay pa ko

nagaalala ako parati

sa nakaraan

sa kasalukuyan

sa mga taong sumakit ng loob ko at di na ko


iniwan ganun

masaya naman ako

kahit walang pamilya

sanay na

maging magisa

the loner life chose me


said some rough words

on my current boss

di kasi professional ang ugali

mali talaga trato sakin

dapat kasi pag may nakita kang ginto


aalagaan mo



sinabi niya pa

may nagsabi daw sakanya

na nag da-drive,

sa commons,

na sabihan ang tauhan mo

na tumingin bago tumawid haha

thats my trademark since berlin days

I literally jaywalk

I don’t care.

It’s not like this is cruel intentions and ryan is just gonna get in there and save reese witherspoon right haha

Di eto titanic

Kaya amp

Pakealam niyo

Do you know months days weeks

na ko di umuuwi sa amin

bakit kasi

di nalang ginawang probinsiya ang Malabon

anu na kaya nangyari sa banyo at kuwarto ko

may maid kami pero di linilinis yung part ko sa bahay

amp yung pinakaluma na ngayung kuwarto ko eh

hahaha chos

i miss my friends but they dont miss me!

after all

magkaiba kami ng buhay

sila, di kailangan mag street life lel

super duper



as in like nasa bahay lang

di kailangan magtrabaho sa


yaman yaman


wala na ko masabe

malungkot lang na

di ako magiging writer sa Pilipinas

kahit anak nalang bigay niyo Lord

pero alam ko

tagal pa nun


I kept eating lately

kasi parang nangayayat ako nung nakaraang last two weeks ng agosto

tambay bahay

naka team bahay lang

nasa condo lang hahaha

pa circuit circuit nung nakalabas


oy by the way

as in kahapon lang ako kumain ng masarap 😦

dati tambayan ko army navy sa circuit


di ko na trip


kaya natuwa nalang ako sa chicken pie ng bannaple sigh

culinary philippines

nag isaw nalang dapat oy


tas kanina lang ako nakakain ng grabe sarap

as in coco ibanya estancia kakaibabe talaga

service is excellente par excellance

tapos kahit mahal busog diba

eh di wow din I chugged down a whole box of pizza

8 slices nom nom

masaya naman kanina

parang pede talaga ko mag give up sa company

pero nag start na ko sa sales

kaya tuloy mo lang

isipin mo

kahit di ko gusto yung posisiyon ko ngayon

balang araw kahit san man ako

aangat din

salamat sa lahat ng taong nag care sakin tapos talagang nagsabi na bilib sila

na malakas potential ko

na salamat sa oras


props to those people I respect na sinabihan talaga ko lupet daw lodi

di lang ako basta basta tumatanggap ng kritisismo

lalo na kung ikaw mas bata pa sakin

tapos di kita trip

tapos kung anu ano sinasabi na magaling ako ganon

idgaf motherfucker

di ka boss sa Ayala



kadiri talaga teammates ko

pangarap ko eto

1 be very busy as of the moment

2 plan your life for 2019

3 okay lang second runner up …actually secondplacer dapat ang tawag ulol , sa guest awarding for august pft wtv sabi kasi ako daw top manloloko sinungaling wtv losers

4 umahon ka ‘day

5 kahit di ko mashow sa world talents ko, aware ako na malayo mararating ng mga ginagawa ko

6 at talagang aesthetically inclined ako sa mga sinig at iba pa

7 ok lang di ako dancer

8 sensiya na

9 balak ko tumbahin ang mundo balang araw

10 at sumabak

sa bawat laban haharapin.

Amen haha sarreh don’t rly pray um uh





so far i love ortigas

nevermind the manager

or the teammates

or the redundancy of manning

i was self made

for sales

it comes a matter of time


i wont ever be paasa na

sa mga akala mo maclose na

petiks lang pala

parang ayala lang

hello tears

nasan ka na

parang nawalan ka na nang



its gonna get better

yay 101 follows

sana makatravel na ko

ang tagal na

antayin pa yata to ng pasko

yay ig and fb


hope this blog flourish

sana lang

may mag like pa

patunay at patibay na

kaya ko,pa manulat

kasi hindi naman parin ako writer

sa dami ng inapplayan ko

para di ako dito sa pinas

sana mag kaanak nalang ako

mawala ganon