Did I say this right.

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Dear all 64 followers

do you know that feeling when youve reached the end of the tunnel and youve seem to have gotten nothing out of the ordinary in your journey when you entered that tunnel in the first place ?

Thats how I feel these days.

I dont pray but I know shit dont matter if I do anyway, Im still damned in this motherfucking sales job

Got no friends or even this thing called a Family.

My mom keeps insisting I got one but has no idea how to actually understand me and whatever it is I am going through.


After all I have been self-supporting ever since


25 is such a sad terrible age.


Got no love life, got caged into a job you dont like, you smile everyday like the pain doesn’t matter.


Met some wonderful people,


Whilst others I wish I never have spoken to them a single utterance


Such a shame I trusted and opened up to you ya know.


Took you in and gave you my very rare self and personality.


Felt like I wasted my entire time and life in this job called sales.


One client called me by chance yesterday.


Felt like a miracle but maybe this is the sign


Plus my boss reprimanded me for not knowing anything


I have such high regard for him and then he dared speak to me like im shit.


And also quitting my job means no more seeing my officemates who are gossipy and ugly




Thanks by the way if ever you gossip behind my back when I quit before my goddamn nobody cares birthday month,


Thank you.


Thank you for insulting me behind my back, laughing at me, calling me names and other shit.


If you live in sales at least have some decency to be self-reflexive on what you disclose to others.


Stop gossiping!!!




Your fake highlights already look dumb.


Stop protruding yourself as dumber than dumb.



Im just so fed up


So what if I still have prospective clients?


Like my tita’s friend has a brother who is a seaman in Algeria who is on a “dead zone” right now


Like me hahah on a “dead spot”


No family, no boyfriend, no real friends


I applied to clavel magazine but they aint gonna read that shit anyway


Whats the point






Im so tired I just wanna die.



Thanks by the way to the people I met who turned out to be nothing but nutjobs who never will have conscience and dare I say, a sense of politeness to apologize!!!!


Here is to my dead career as a dead salesman


A loner agent day by day getting clients



Wetting herself with shame and many money wasted day by day by day

Still not getting any.



Thanks to the people I met. To name, it is Calvin and Ming.


Yeah so bye. Kudos to meine enemies


Insulto pa more, karma kayo.

PANIS !!!!!!!!!








In relation to water.


So I have this officemate who just recently got into our team

Im just quite sad she spreads rumours and violence to others

Like me, I mean come on, why do you have to say what your boss

Tells you or like, why do you have to call this person a bitch

Why do you have to tell the guy I am deeply in love with that I am

Such a bad person.


Don’t you have any sense of conscience? Feelings ? God ?? In you really !?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!


Nakakahurt lang, wag kang panira nang buhay nang tao

Mind your own shit horse lady


God will give you the karma you deserve

I just cannot believe in my own FUCKING MIND I FUCKING TRUSTED in you


To the guy who will never love me,


I already know.


















don’t you dare mess with me







Across cultural chasms

Partly lately ive been having many sleepless nights over the weeks, calling my clients and not getting any

But you know my limits are beyond words that i shall stay within march

Then comes april my birthday

I’ll hideout again or go to a bar

Or something.


So now im in a mall chilling with my newly bought brown chainbracelets that are real elegant and amusing

Im really bit tired lately since u know sleep gainz aint nothing happenin

And i just drift around sometime from place to place searching for something i got no shit wondering about

Like where can i find my kind of people?

Recently i just told my best friend via text how much she meant to me, labeling our relationship as besties

How sweet right.

Tomorrow i wake up and its another story

IMG_20180310_133410.jpgLoner gurl


Cheers to your works of saturating here there everywhere to meeting people by the gift of this sales job

I aint gonna regret the part I leave   the industry.

I met the greatest bosses who man our team very well!!!

Really there really are people of inspirations out there who bring out the best in you!!!

And my manager is THE BEST

im just sad about other things like plastics in the workplace,

Office drama

The politics



I realized if a person really loves you, he will reach out and apologize to you in person and respect that he really hurt you bad

But there will be people who be accusin’ you of shit you barely do

Thats just the saddest part.

Like you love them

But let them go


Like strangers/


Isnt it nice though there are movies like Shape of Water?



I miss my acads deeply, like what goes on in my mind these days are music sales music sales music sales



Let it happen


Lates im currently worried


about my status at work


Like awks


Tatagal ba ko sa trabaho


Or bye bye na sa march??


I so wanna earn money

and live and learn :



Travel and surf


Maybe download Tinder jwk

So maybe life aint what we planned out ya know

But there will be people out there to plant seeds


Of hope


And inspire us to become who we are meant to be,


So always learn.

Despite the pain

Choose your people.

Never give up on life


Past is past


Everything and the rest


just goes round.

Say my name.


So latelyimages (2).jpeg

Ive been always alone

Not partying, or anything but

Working my way

Up the industry of sales


Im wishing for some boom drop


out there


You know like keep the cash




Keep your days




Move move move move


Dont look back !!!


Find the power


seek the magic


Your adventure is your life,


Find a great partner


Talk to God


Leave people where you found them


Love, love and love.



God is a miracle.

Here are the things that currently run across my mind

Baguio God Sales Limit.



Its getting late and its been hours since I have tried to upload my baguio street photography stash but the internet doesnt seem to cooperate




Ive since realised you can always make your life better


Ie. if you dont fit in with your job or the people there uninspire you go search a new one !!

eight hours ago you were a different person

NOW you can always always change your life for the better.


Seriously like im sitting right now in a coffee shop with fleas buzzing around me and it annoys the fuck out of me but for the sake of wifi


Im staying

See the bigger picture

Why do we work


Because we need to earn money to fuel our dreams.


There always is a cause and effect


Everything that happens to us have consequences that stems from the root of our action


If you believe in mind over matter,


All the bad luck coming or whatever shitty days you might have are nothing but water


So relating to water,

I’ve recently watched Shape of Water and it was incredible.


Im so sorry if the tone of this narrative is irritable (said previously im staying at a crappy coffee shop writing this piece profusely )



Lates ive been frantic about the meaning of life,

Like searching for your Truest self.

Examples might be going back to writing, getting runs from the gym or say, losing yourself over something ot someone in order to find yourself paradoxically in a way


I mean, ive been on this sales job since March of 2017 and it has been killing my insides so deeply that I have never imagined doing this sort of job and talking to these many people or hearing retorts that may be rhetorical or heavily idiotic to put it

Im so sorry im blogging my private thoughts on the internet


But lately ive been so sad im afraid depression might rain on me again like it did last 2013 when my tooth got chipped over a zombie run


Um or that horrid times abroad where I came and went for five months vying over a job title that meets the meager salary of a “yaya” in the Philippines aka Teaching assistant at a preschool or TA.

See, if I wrote over these experiences like going door to door in Mandarin cram schools looking for a job at 22, to finding one and getting paid your first summer camp salary at 23 and getting admitted to a real world job at 22 not from your current country

After getting denied from previous publishing industries locally postgrad I had to find my first ever real world job abroad

Many things happened to me alone in another country,

Like eating strange cuisine or talking to so many random strangers or looking onto coffee shops like snowglobes and wondering where my friends and family at

Or crying because my list of dreams in college got ruined because I dont have the support or financial capacity to fund it all like shit

So you see, the real world is tough and the vapidity of it all is self absorbing engrossment of capitalism and lack of education amongst peers around you who never fully knew the importance or grace of academic society, aka getting schooled.

When I entered sales I was frenetic and lost to the point of breaking my limits like crying since January or losing it whenever those “paasa” clients seem to hit it like crazy

But never actually buying into the idea of investment.

I never thought I would enter a wild world of drinking, cold calls and smoke everywhere like cray

Not that I hate it, I mean Ive always had ideals

But now they’ve been quite broken

From the roots of money and pain, the causes of unemployment and the search of another and the self in the ruthless world of changing economies and titles and global warming and months to the future and panic,

Ive had loads of doubts and fears to the point 2017 both terrified me and made me a stronger woman amidst the fall of literal and metaphysical worlds.

I have got many stories to tell and my grammar has been rusty since im not literally around academics,

But I promise you readers and 60 meager followers I will read to the best of success that I can.

And I will write with passion and wit and humour and pain and happiness to the limits of my existence.

Heres my prayer to each and everyone to be invincible, to follow your dream and to not let anyone have power over you, choose to love others, always be kind because love is kind.

Love is and always will be kind.



Hey all,

So lately I’ve been having heartaches, broken expectations, dump hells and all the ups and downs we all know we’re talkin about.


I’ve been working So very hard on my life, my perspective, my artistic dreams and all that shit lately wondering if im still up for a sales job or should I just run and keep up with all the Ideals ive had since college or like maybe go to europe and get lost


Where do you find yourself, your purpose, your soul, your lifeline.

Love, where are you now ?




I have been pretty depressed again

But working real hard !!!


I realized I have been thinking too much of what I had gotten into

That I stopped to sleep well and cried over so many things that are painful but petty illogical unlikely causals

I never should have gotten myself into


It’s just that life pretty much determines where we go from where we got up from


I was never really a part of my family

That’s why lately my heart has this aching hole to find like, a home or a family, something like that.

Where do you find Spiderman or say, God?

How do you stay alive when you don’t eventually know where you put all your hard work for is going to go?

See what I mean,

I think too much. I fuck up a lot but Seriously, I have been working so hard been quite paranoid and lately, lonely


Where am I going


Are my dreams still made and ebbed in time?




I just found this article online.



I realized this.



People will always be judgmental and will give you hints whether they like you or not. Life will always be unfair whether or not people are willing to place some conviction on the premise that the system will always run on winners and losers.

We are born with parents we never chose, a race we never agreed to, social financial backdrop we were bred and given raised to. Something that will always stay and be a part of us regardless of how we choose to be.

I’m just simply implying that sometimes, what we think or presume aint really the Truth. People fake things and it’s really hard to find kind, genuine individuals on earth.

When we finally find those, we should keep them around us, those people who actually care you’ve eaten and those who actually care if you found a home.

Disguises are pretty common.

Seek the truth behind those lenses, and you will find that reality is all pretense and people are fucked but we all just have that magic to hold onto whenever we feel alone.

Fill your life with people whom you look up to, and never succumb to the Judgments or whatever shitty presumptuous outlook people may tag or label you. It is after all, YOUR LIFE.

Know when to give, also when to give up. We are humans, and we always have doubts, weaknesses, feelings and needs

The struggle is not to survive living, the real surge comes from the notion of whether the people around us are actually THERE for us when we need them the most.

People leave, come and go.

A Reality is that the ones who TRULY love and respect us, will always find a way to make their presence be known

#LONERGIRL finding art, love, home.

Where is the love Truth peace??? 💲Find your voice ,  your place  , BE WHO YOU REALLY ARE












Or a restless leaf, a footprint.

Is fault on a blameless day,

scrawled on a washed-out sky.


My friend’s music orbits his home,

worms through the cracks

in the bluest lines, ever new


and permanent, staining even his hope

long after the lights stutter away.

And the rain’s attenuated sorrows?


They’re coming, he says. Like goats

through a fence. Like lava. Like tomorrow.


Copyright 2017 Robert Okaji

Easy Love.

I may always make mistakes and consume all those iced lattes from Starbucks and some of those capitalist bullshit, but dare I say despite not having any : family, friends, a someone to lean onto, there will be many misadventures yet to happen in my life, to wishing amnesia from all moments of despair and stress and catapulting loneliness or dementia or shit like crappy days to batshit memories or crazy yellings from mother to regretting I had this thing called a second Life.

Im wishing you grow up into the woman you are destined to be. Never forget those who cheered for you! Someday, you shall and will have a decent family and some company too. Real ones. XOXO, cheerios. 💄


I Thank God Everyday :)


Hello dear followers!

Thanks so much for going through some random stuff on my blog, I can’t believe you guys are 52 already and I mostly don’t even blog about random personal stuff

To be honest much has been going on lately, I missed the afterparty then also been overworking lately in my current work. It’s been almost a year, come about april, I want to reap a sale or two, God please.

I feel like maybe smoking a couple of weed could do it, rough jobs in sales are such a pity for introverts like me who pretty much overanalyze and foresight everything onto the equation

So anyway

I haven’t found my friends yet. Those change makers who come into your life like angels and wish your dream pull you up and never let go


Those people who really value you to see you make it real hard in this world and protect you from the harsh reality you already endured.

I wanna be around people who don’t take and undermine you and boss you around like you’re such a low status ranking peasant

and they’re like the queen biatches or kween bees of the world


enough to undercut your priceless existence

Ya know

Stay real

Haters gon’ hate

Stay gold.

Ps: please avoid people who always have their way /s with you, like asking for shit, toying with your feelings, treating ya differently in public vis-a-vis private, uncultured nondiscreet


Oh, you know uhm people who disclose gossip and low level conversations juxtapose that with bejeweled intellectual talk talk.

I am seriously depressed with the people who surround me.

It seems more likely to say that people you hold a pedestal to, having known them for them but actually having no idea on who they really, really are. Anyways I am heavily apologetic for this rant sesh.

Just been crazy lonely lately figuring out who I am like it’s high school again and wondering where my path lies this year

Learning that every challenge comes an opportunity

And treat people nicely despite the heartache

Of them treating you like a piece of shit (aka you dont exist in this space right here *  * )

I’ve gone through some terrible shit but not this social suicide

where you put your entire soul on a person and they just light a smoke and set a fire to burn your heart.

I rarely write about boys but really though, find someone who loves you

The real, unwitheld, facade-less genuine





#TakeChances / #TakeAim

Get up

gotta get going even though life fucks us up . Get baked. Smoke crack. Build foundations that hold you, carry you

Follow and look up to leaders who possess empathy and Truth

This is your life

you, millenial.

Gotta get get going


Speak out.


Lately you will realize life is one blank page and nobody can ever really understand you and your life  how your soul works or your mind


Someday you will know that it is better to love yourself and listen to people genuinely to discern yourself than to give yourself full to another.

Make you change, don’t dwell too much and spark something that will count one day in the future. Stop relying on others to tell you how it’s like. Tell the world how you want your life to be. Behold, this is the new.

being grateful,


ive just recently been to dubai.

Its been real nice.

the food was amazing I ate much, but

The people were so kind and open.

I really liked how this little african baby just kept staring at me.

And all the head covers they have and scarves and them elegant long cloaks Muslim women wear are a mystery to some foreign girl like me.

theme parks were awesome,

Rode a roller coaster with a Jewish family.

Also visited synagogues and mosques.

Reminiscent of Germany


Happy new year



Im counting up the stars

to the time when finally forever is in the palm of my hand and infinity is where everlasting hills and valleys

light up

the path where everyone goes. Where streets are fled empty and full of beaming sunshines and tinkerers.

The dream is here, catch some pretty fireflies and enigma.


Dreamcatchers weave the shattered past of passageways and busybodied vendors, of lamps and carriages.

May your Christmas today, shine as bright and promising!

Always love and full of brimming adventures,

XX Sherry 💋

Saying thanks


I rarely find the time to work out lately so im catching it up with some shopping haha. I still cant feel the moment when 2017 is ending. I had a lot of ups and downs this year that made me teary eyed but grateful. Also I met some people with beautiful souls and got some friends whom I think will never leave me. Theres nothing quite left to say either when you have 411 likes and 43 follows just in a years time. I miss LA and travelling in general. Hope to go on a trip soon by myself. Tomorrow I go to the woods with my friend Anna. I hope our trip would be fun. I miss writing letters in Japanese too to my pen pal. Haha. So many things you missed out doing because you were working the iron cage. So anyway catch ya later. Thanks for reading. You are wonderful and amazing.





My november was so pretty time flew by so fast. I recently watch the duff and cyberbully movies and realized how it must be like to be outed or humiliated in public by casting out so much hate speech or defamatory bs,

So anyways I just recently had a ball fitting from a designer near our home. Im excited to see how its like to wear something fancy, like fifty shades of grey movie! Haha kidding.

Will update you followers how I will manage to survive the upcoming holidaze. Must be so much work but in practice I am hoping for some willing zest and zen. Toodles. Peace out xx 🙂

So rare


So lately I just woke up and its November already.

I missed writing and college, frivolous things like crushes and daydreams and outfits like which mood represents what you wear

Lately I feel strongly attracted to someone,

Which may or may not pull me off the edge ‘ ya know

So far God has been good to me, I have ridden two Grab cars with great ambiance music rules and shebangs

You already know it

Peace out xx



Its okay to not have everything figure out, its okay not to have a family, its okay not to have a best friend, its okay not to believe in a god, its okay to have no boyfriend, its okay to forgive others who dont deserve it.

You deserve the happiness you choose. Kill em with kindness. Quit your job. Eat healthy. Sleep. Live life for yourself until you meet those people. Dont waste time. Lifes short.

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Fragile cities

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This year I have been grateful to have met people worthy of me.

My life has its turnabouts, such as my family leaving me. Also, there will be people whom may not have the kind understanding why I harbor my resentment toward my own parents.

Likewise sending me here and there.. everywhere! To all parts of the world.

Unnamingly, as I pour piece by piece, tear by tear ounces of myself in this blog , I pray to cope and find moments of healing : for my sickness, my growth, my place in this world.

And a couple of understanding. That’s all we will ever need in our life.

To the people who left me and declined me, thanks.

Self recovery


Lately im all psyched up for 2018!

I just recently bought a Berlin journal and some self-made intricate personal, made for you notebook for ascribing my thoughts and sentiments into this hardwired world.

Oftentimes really, it may seem likely too depressing to be ignored by somebody we feel too much for, that we lash out or get mad at them for nothing, barely reasonable action for us to make,

Or is it supremely a jagged out-of-this world, why-can’t-you-respond- or ask-me-out type of anger.

Is it just me or it’s hard to love someone, or even find one who has the same heart as you,

Just clarifying feelings is tremendous, it’s not like we’re gonna be together.

This is for you,

If you’ve ever felt the urgent need to find yourself, look out the world and see a version paralleling the future-

I thoroughly support whatever you’re going through.

It’s okay if you are stuck or lost, at some job you dislike, days wasted away thinking how it can be so much nicer to just get away and chill and live.

To love, life and its people.

Inspiring others, making everyday great, traveling to new places, meeting aliens and foreign people, trying out different cultures to probing the probability of darkness- the unknown and the unfamiliar .

It’s easy to say we’ve moved on.

But part of the terrain shakes us and wakes us to extremes that something is terribly wrong with us or the world, is the world coming to an end?

Why can’t the people we love, love us back?


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Lately, I’ve been on the verge of quitting my sales job. I couldn’t take any of it anymore as I hurl myself through long days of September laying awake at night for as long as I can remember.

All I want is a fresh new start and good beginning to look onto. Something that largely agrees with my ideals and lifelong goal.

What’s worse is I made a confession to a guy I barely knew. Who by the way, didn’t really reciprocate my soul of feelings but passively acknowledge it.

Meg from Hercules would probably say, Boys are a pain – oh boy. Is she right. May the universe grant me a new life, and may I keep on writing for future’s sake.

Love loves and thanks for reading!


Closed flowers

Whilst June may be quite over for most of us, It has given me plenty sentiments like having doubts and confusion about the present. To lost a lot of heart is a bad deal, but to gain love and light is all we ever search for.

  • I have no family. Yes enough.
  • I have no money. Where and how.
  • No boyfriend HAHAHAHA
  • Too vulnerable and open to people. Too trusting, humane or uhm sensitive? Hmm .
  • Don’t agree with my $ — job .
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